sempiternals | Hang up all my fragile thoughts

[Stroking up the backs of his thighs, Euler basks in the attention of those fingers in his hair, the smile sent down upon him. It feels like a benediction, and he hums, leisurely wrapping his arms around Pharos' legs, just enough to get them cuddled together.] Hmm. You earned it. You've been excellent at dealing with all of this.

[ Kaveh lets himself be tugged in that little more, curling contently against Euler and holding him, a lazy smile on his lips.

For a moment, at least, until the other speaks and has his head tilting in slight confusion. ]

Mm...? I dunno. I think maybe you're giving me too much credit.

[ After all, it doesn't matter what "all of this" is referring to specifically; Kaveh thinks he's been a mess through most of it. Which...

Ah. Quietly, he rearranges himself, lying down properly alongside Euler, curling in closer as a thought forms on his lips. ]

...I should tell you my name. For real, this time. If you do have to talk with him, it helps for you to know it. Right?

Your name?

[Not that it'd change anything. There's no one that Alhaitham would need to talk about, but it makes sense for Kaveh to ask. And yet, knowing that side of Pharos' privacy while keeping his own real name to himself would be another unequal factor to their relationship. Euler already pays for Pharos' time, after all.] Wouldn't Pharos work?

[ It's a brief, soft flash of embarrassment that crosses Kaveh's face, and after a moment, he presses it against Euler's shoulder in an attempt to hide it. ]

"Pharos" is a public figure at this point. I know I'm not hugely famous like some of the streamers out there, but it's recognizable enough that there's a chance he could stumble across it. I'll tell him in my own time but... we met through our job; I don't want to...

[ He bites his lip, awkward and falling silent for a moment. ]

It's... I trust him not to go looking, but it's just. Something I'd rather not share just yet.

[Oh. That's so precious. Alhaitham weaves his fingers through Kaveh's hair, softly stroking it so he can cradle him close against his chest.

He's too sweet. He'd never thought that he'd be so darling when he set out to meet this streamer.]

Hm, I see.[He nuzzles his head.] Well, how about we both give you a nickname, considering the… particularities of our relationship?

Something nice. [He strokes and rubs a golden strand between his fingers, watching it glimmer under the mood lighting.] Like Light. 'Our Light'.

[ 'Light', Euler says, and for a single moment Kaveh softens into him completely. He doesn't realize the other is looking at his hair and the way it glimmers, instead thinking to the name of his online presence, the very name he was prepared to toss away just moments before.

And then he says our Light, and Kaveh feels positively faint.

He can't quite help the way he shifts, tilting his head up and seeking Euler's mouth with his, pressing against it in a soft, brief kiss. ]

You— you're wonderful. I really like that, Mister E. I hope he does too.

[ And then he kisses him once more, still soft but with some insistence this time, an act of boldness having him push Euler slightly so that he's sprawled on top of him as he tastes his mouth all over again. ]

[The chuckle he releases is unabashed, as so are his hands that stroke up his thighs, his back, stroke that smooth expanse of skin as he wraps his arms around him to kiss him back.] I can see that.

[He brings him in for another kiss, lapping deep, slow into him. Kissing Pharos, Kaveh, he's finding addicting in every kind.

He drinks him up, until he strokes his cheek, watching Pharos on top of him, the light creating a halo around the cradle of his hair.] You're wonderful, too.

[ Kaveh smiles as he's tugged back down into another kiss, sighing against Euler's mouth and settling against him, hands bracing on the other's chest, hips arched and pressing into him. He's hardening quickly, just from kisses (and from the thoughts of more), and he sighs in content, meeting that lapping tongue with his own as his hands trail along firm muscle. ]

Euler— do you have energy for one more round? [ It's a whisper against the other's mouth, his fingers pushing at the other's hair. ] I wanna... I'd like to do something for you.

[He can't help but cradle Pharos' neck as he brings him in for another kiss, then holds him tight as he deepens the kiss once more. His eyes flutter closed again, the feeling of those fingers in his hair hypnotic and pleasurable, as much as the weight of the man on top of him, which he can't help writhe against, warmth already well-settled in his core.]

I'm surprised you have to ask. [He smiles, pecks him softly.] I like it that you're insatiable.

Good.

[ It's a soft whisper, another sweet kiss shared between them before Kaveh sits up, stretching back to put the whole of him display, even the way his own cock is starting to swell into renewed hardness. And then he reaches for the sidetable, grabbing up a bottle of lube and splashing some onto his fingers. ]

I know we can't fuck yet, but... mm, it's gonna feel like we really.. like we really are.

[ He twists, hand curling behind his own body to wrap around Euler's cock, stroking firmly once, twice, three times, spreading the lube so that he's sticky and wet. Then the blonde moves a little more, shifts so that the other will fuck right into the space between his asscheeks as he rides atop him.

He bites his lips, looking down as he shifts slightly, letting the other feel the drag. ]

How's that?

[How can Alhaitham even answer when Kaveh so eagerly moves and strokes his cock so temptingly, back and chest arched as he reaches behind him, the chain he just gifted him glimmering beautifully around his waist with the subtle motions of his wrist. He reaches for him, strokes at his chest, his stomach, reverent while fighting the urge to just thrust against the touch, into him, seeking the core of him as much as his own craves him.

He lets out a pained groan, nods eagerly.] Yes. Yes.

[ He smiles at the sound on Euler's lips, nods; a groan on his own mouth as he shifts to roll down against him, smooth in his movements, shuddering each time the other's hard cock rolls between his cheeks, fucking him without actually being inside. And it's hard to focus, but he tries to make a show of it; raises his hands to his hair and plays with it as he moves, makes low sounds at the sensations, tries to catch Euler's eyes with his own. ]

Fuck— I think you might be bigger than any of my toys, Mister E.. how would it feel to have you fuck me open...?

Pharos… [This is torture. As sweet and lovely this is, Kaveh is taunting him while looking like he's enraptured by the mere image of Alhaitham fucking into him. He's never been the kind to consider his own size to begin with, but having him roll his hips, show off his hair, keep him imprisoned in his gaze, he wishes to split him apart.

He reaches to wrap Kaveh's cock with his fingers, squeezing him gently.] I'd fill you up so nicely. [He rasps, rolling his hips into the cleft of his cheeks.] I bet you'd be so warm inside.

[ He gasps when Euler's hand reaches to wrap around him, to squeeze him, when the other's rasping voice tells him how good he would feel, how well he'd fill him up— it makes him shudder, the whole length of him atop Euler, and for a moment it's hard to move. But he doesn't stop, wanting the other to have as much of the sensation as he can; he writhes atop him as he keeps moving.

It would be so easy. So easy for Euler to just move, to fill him up. Gods, he wants— this was the best kind of mistake— ]

Fuck... oh, I want.. I want you, Euler. Fill me up, even.. even if it's just pretend, let me... ngh, let me feel all of you, please.

[How easy it would be to slip into him, to have him warm wrapped around him, to hold him and drive into him to make him gasp and moan. Alhaitham's control feels like a pained vice that leaves a brand under his skin, and he tugs Kaveh down so he can lean over him, to bite at his lips.

His fingers find an asscheek that he squeezes with gusto, slips them along the curve to press his cock against the line a little bit harder, teases his fingertips along the rim of his hole.] You'll take me so well, won't you?

[It's a promise. If Pharos—Kaveh—wants him, at the end of it all. He can promise, it's the least he can do.]

[ What he's not expecting in Euler's response is the way the other man's fingers curl and squeeze over his asscheek, tugs at it to let him press harder, then teases those fingers against him in a way that has him gasp out in needy pleasure. Tugged down over Euler the way that he is, it's all he can do to seek hungry, needy little kisses from the other's mouth, panting as their hips roll together. ]

Yes— mn, yes please Euler, fuck— I will, I'll be so ready for you. I won't touch myself for a week, won't fuck myself on stream, just... just wait for you so I can make it feel so good, and—

[ His hips rolls slightly against the other, more than just the movements he's been making as he rides him. ]

Mmn but right now I know you won't so— please... please fuck me with your fingers—

You could, you know. [He whispers as he laps at his mouth, a fond, loving gaze shaping the corner of his eyes as he rolls a pad of his finger around the puckered muscle, stroking up and down to gather some of the smeared lube on the surface.] You could fuck yourself, but it wouldn't be the same. It wouldn't be me.

[He's unable to stop the roll of his own body, though, and how he grinds into the flesh like he was doing it for real. He presses a tender, soft kiss.] Give me more lube, baby. I've got you.

I know I could, but I'd want... mn, waiting will just make it feel so much better, right? For both of us?

[ Another groan slips from his lips even as Kaveh reaches for the lube again, blind fingers groping out across the bed until they close around the tube.

(It's hard to focus with Euler fucking him like this, rolling against him like it's real.) ]

H-Here. Gods, please...

So gorgeous… [he whispers, even as he presses kisses along Kaveh's neck, hiding the heat on his cheeks against his skin, busying and grounding himself in the lovely arch of it before he does something they both may regret.

He nudges them apart just a little so he can sit up, leans on the headboard as he coats his fingers generously, then pulls him in again for a kiss as he slips them down in between his buttocks, finding the spot where Kaveh wants them.] Yes, I get you all for myself. You get me all for yourself.

It'll be so good, baby. [He rakes his teeth over the skin of his jaw as he slips the first one in.] So good.

[ He gasps out in pleasure when the other slips a finger into him even as he keeps moving, even as he promises him things Kaveh knows they both so desperately want. He keens, body arching as he sees stars bursting behind his eyelids, and with Euler pressing kisses into his neck it allows him for a moment to hide his face in the other's hair, panting softly into the soft strands. ]

I know...

[ he pants it out as Euler's mouth moves to his jaw instead, hips continuing to rock down against the other, wanting him to feel as good as Euler's making him feel. ]

I know it will. I... ah, fuck.. I can't wait for it. Do you know how.. how often I've imagined you instead of my toys?

I have imagined it, too. [He kisses him again, stroking his cock in the same rhythm as he thrusts his fingers, one at first, two following. He's gasping against Kaveh's lips and meeting his body as it grinds low each time, but he wants to see that lovely creative mind of his flare into his own pleasure.] You'll take me so well, you'll make me wish I never have to pull out.

I already wish that.

[ His answer comes in a rush, a mix of breath and sharp moan as his body cants against Euler's. And perhaps he's being silly, being hyperbolic, but he doesn't care. Right now, he'd give this man anything and everything, let him take whatever he wants from him— ]

Imagine doing your work with me sitting in your lap, keeping you warm. You could, mn... you could keep me filled for you all day, fucking me while you're doing paperwork. And I could... after work, I could cook for you, too, but it might be hard for me to focus...

[ Between the pair of fingers thrusting into him now and the dirty thoughts working through his imagination, Kaveh's close. He breathes out a weak, shaky sigh against Euler's mouth. ]

Please. One more, please.

[His imagination is taking him further than Alhaitham had wanted, but he's not complaining. The idea of Kaveh being sat on his lap, warm and tight around the length of him as he worked, sleeping soft while keeping their arousal into a low simmer, keeping the beautiful warmth of them together, is enough to have him thrust sharper into the jut of Kaveh's thigh with his pelvis, making him groan as he slips again to meet where a third finger joins the other two, doing what he promised himself and Kaveh he wouldn't do.]

Anything. [He murmurs into his lips, and curls his fingers, searching for that one spot.] Anything you want and more.

[ He shakes his head, groans too loud as Euler's thrust is harder and sharper, as it teases somewhere the other has already told him he won't take this, Kaveh responding immediately by rolling back against fingers and cock, wishing more than anything he'd press into him where he knows he won't. The blonde huffs out a soft sigh, presses their mouths more firmly together— and then yelps, gasps, as curling fingers find that one weak spot, pressing in a way that makes him see stars.

Despite it, despite the way his back arches and his cry is all but a sob, Kaveh's voice is a soft, urgent scold: ]

Don't— don't tell me you'll give me anything. It.. it.. ah, fuck— it makes me want more than I'm allowed to have. And you know I'd take it if you would let me—

[ He would, it in a heartbeat; it's all he can do now not to beg for it all over again, knowing that Euler won't let him have it. Despite what they're doing, the sting of rejection rides high in his chest. And despite that, his imagination runs strong, giving him all he desires and more. ]

Sweetheart… [He sighs, kissing Kaveh to silence, to feel the motion of his fingers, to focus on the parts where they touch, where they're united. Alhaitham wishes he could, too, but it would be a lie, it would be Kaveh giving himself to someone he wouldn't really want to. Kaveh doesn't know what he'd be begging for.

So he pinches at his pierced nipple at the same time he twists and curls his fingers again, swallowing every sound and every breath that Kaveh releases.]

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