sempiternals | How could your heart be stolen by a human?

( Wriothesley does not recall asking, but here he is, internally cringing at the mention of Kaveh's intimacy with Mael. It was one thing to stumble into their sleeping, sated bodies after that night but another entirely to hear the words come out of Kaveh's mouth. He wishes he could unhear, unsee all the imagery of Mael's hands all over his body. One way or another, he'll be paying for it later anyway. )

I...Don't really need to hear it, Kaveh. It's not illegal to be sleeping around with inmates so long as you're aware of the underlying risks. Given this situation, I heavily advise against it for your sake. There's always the surface you can visit for those types of escapades.

( He clears his throat, adjusting the collar on his shirt so he can feel the cool air soothing his neck from increasingly getting hotter. He really looks forward to lecturing Mael, to give him a scare that'll make him wish he were dead instead. )

It's fine. I'm content at the moment and I don't date. I also learned that happiness on its own is a fickle reality. I don't exactly trust the idea of happiness, but it would be nice to have, I suppose.

Nothing is ever as it seems even in a perfect world, but you can have perfect moments and still reap the same amount of nourishment. Frankly, those moments tend to be the most trustworthy.

( Kaveh didn't actually hear him back when they were talking in the bedroom, did he? He had to summon so much to lift those words to existence and now he has to do it again? )

For example, I'm not happy about you went through, but I am happy to talk to you again.

Y-Yeah, I... [ Kaveh's eyes open, and he looks up at where Wriothesley is perched on the edge of the tub, a small smile on his lips as he considers the other man. ] I think I'm done screwing around for a while anyway. [ It's not like it was really bringing him any joy or making him feel better, not when he would go to bed dreaming of the man in front of him now instead of any of his errant partners.

He winces to do it, but one hand comes up, fingers finding and threading through the warden's. He heard the words before, but the other feeling the need to say them again perhaps means he didn't acknowledge it well enough, and so he squeezes his hand— another wince— before letting go to drop it back into the bathwater. ]

I'm happy to talk to you again too. I missed you a lot. It felt weird— I'd see you, and I'd want to go and tell you something that happened, you know, not about work, and. I couldn't, and... I dunno, I didn't like it.

[ He hasn't felt this way in years, not since he ripped up that paper and taped it back together in misery after the fact. ]

But you know... if you see happiness as something fickle and don't trust it, then you'll never let yourself really have it. Isn't it important to go for what you want? Life isn't that long for those of us who aren't gods...

( And to think weeks used to go by between them texting one another before this work arrangement. The sheer coldness of thinking Kaveh will someday return to Sumeru and not spend time like this with him freezes the veins in his body. Even as their hands come together, Wriothesley knows not to become more attached than he is, unless he wants to suffer later. It's selfish, keeping this to himself while Kaveh bleeds in front of him wearing every emotion on his wrists. )

I speak from experience. I've already given happiness a chance.

( Granted, he seems more protective of his comfort now, leaving all his other wishes far away in the distance than to fall into someone else's lies. )

Well, we can talk now, can't we? Do you have more complaints about your roommate back in Sumeru?

( As much as he teases, he also hasn't forgotten about the opened tabs from everything else Kaveh has mentioned. He brings up the roommate often, enough to make Wriothesley feel like he's simply another phase in his life. Just as Mael was a phase for Kaveh living here. He doesn't believe for a second Kaveh is going to subscribe to the abstinent lifestyle. Even Wriothesley doesn't consider himself overly active and he still can't go a week without sex. )

I'm teasing. Were you going to rinse off your hair, or do you need help with that, too?

( It's an excuse to steer the topic off before the perfect moment sinks. )

[ Kaveh's brows raise in response to the other's first statement. He's "given happiness a chance"? What does that mean? He wants to ask, wants to dig deeper down and understand him, but it's not his right— especially when he's so cagey about his own past, his own present.

But they're talking now, Wriothesley says, and so—

Yeah. Maybe it's time.

But before he can answer the question, the warden is offering to help with his hair. This time, he doesn't pause long before he nods. Now that he's made the decision, having his hair washed will give him the time. With his head, he indicates the array of shampoo bottles, and offers a small, hopeful smile. ] Do you mind? I think some blood got in my hair, and I still can't reach up too high.

[ He'll wait, mostly in silence, until Wriothesley is working the liquid into his hair before he finally starts to answer it, telling him one of many truths he's always kept to himself. ]

My roommate... mm, we live together, but it's more appropriate to say he's my landlord. We used to be friends, a long time ago. We fell out, so we're not really that close anymore. I care about him, of course— [ His smile is tired, fond. ] To tell you the truth, he was my first love. I don't think even he knows that, and he knows pretty much everything about me. But he's a logical man, not an emotional bone in his body— and he doesn't experience attraction the way you or I do. So... I guess you could say it's complicated.

Pass me the shampoo bottle, then.
( He starts unwrapping his bandages from his knuckles and arms, exposing an array of scarring with adequate signs of aging. Many of them fade to his skin tone while others appear far more jagged and desperate, having risen to different textures just like the ones on his neck. Probably from the same incident. He puts the bandage aside and rolls up his sleeves, sitting closer to Kaveh so he can scoop water and run it down the back of his skull. He has some experience with pampering, but it's definitely instances that are few and far between. )

I see now why you complain about him so much.

( In other words, he thinks there are still lingering feelings. He can't fathom Kaveh running his mouth about someone so much unless he liked the taste of his name. He frowns as he pours shampoo over his head, steadily massaging it down his scalp and through golden locks until it's all uniform.

So he is just a side chapter in all this. )

Nevermind the sticky living situation, you never told him you loved him?

[ He does as asked; from his angle, it's a little hard for him to see the scarring revealed on Wriothesley's arms as he unwraps his bandages, but Kaveh takes the time to examine what he can before he leans back to allow the other to work on his hair. And while the other man doesn't say as much directly, he know exactly what his words mean, something which causes the blonde to roll his eyes, shoot a pointed glare up in the other's direction. ]

I already told you, dummy. It's not like that, not anymore. This was years ago. Those feelings are long gone. I complain about him because he's a daily pain in my ass. You try living with him and see how well you do.

...But no, I never told him. There wasn't a point, you know? Asexual, aromantic. He was never going to want a relationship or sex. I... kinda need both those things.

[ Kaveh smiles wryly up at Wriothesley. ]

What is it with me falling for unavailable men, though?

( Wriothesley is just starting to figure out his sexuality fully and he's well into his 40s, so, understandably, he doesn't completely trust Kaveh's words about this roommate of his. Who's to say that man isn't also confused by the spectrum of it all? Not that he'll encourage it, anyway, not while Kaveh is underneath his hands getting the scrubbing of a lifetime. He eases his head back slightly so his hair can fall into the water.

All the grime from the Fortress and sweat from his altercation are gone just like that. He carefully brushes back his hair, squeezing thickened strands from the suds of white. )

I'm sure he's a good guy. You wouldn't be living with him if he wasn't.

( He makes eye contact, though, in comparison to Kaveh, Wriothesley appears somewhat troubled. He can't blame Kaveh for thinking that of him after being rejected so much. In-person, over text, over the phone. )

What's with the look?

[ Kaveh sighs in content as the suds are washed from his hair, and then he chuckles, shaking his head as much as he can when the other's hands are working through it. (And it feels nice, he keeps noticing, and keeps trying to make himself not notice.) ]

He has his moments, [ he says, in response to the idea of Alhaitham being a good guy— but he's distracted a little by the look on the other's face, how he looks...

Worried? Concerned? It's something Kaveh can't quite place, and so his head tilts, a question on his lips, but as always, before he can ask, Wriothesley beats him to it, asking his own question instead. So, rules of polite conversation and all... ]

Nothing in particular. I was teasing a little, I guess. Clearly you weren't expecting it.

[ And he grins, but it's only a brief expression before a gentleness returns. ]

Are you alright?

( He can feel the tension slowly seeping away from Kaveh's body. Hefty fingers press down behind his ears, soothing up towards his scalp away and brushing back the longer strands seamlessly. The light shade of blond is darkened and ashy while entirely soaked, too. Unforunately, he's not able to wash away any of those bruises. )

Right. I lose this round, then.

( How does he undo everything? )

Just thinking.
I'll grab a towel for you before you cook in the brine. How's the pain level?

[ Kaveh doesn't believe him— not for a second. But that doesn't really matter, does it? What matters is Wriothesley's willingness to tell him anything, and right now, that willingness is non-existent. And Kaveh has to be okay with that. So, as always, he smiles his answer, nods his agreement— getting out of the bath sounds good—

And as for the pain level... ]

Mm, it's not terrible right now. I think the salts and the ice you put on before... they both really helped. Some general painkiller medicine wouldn't go astray if you have any, though...

( He hears every single thing Navia ever told him, and the more seconds tick by, the more he sees his chances fleeting again. Wriothesley shakes off excess water from his hands so he can grab a towel for him. This time, he gives Kaveh complete privacy to dry, leaving the towel folded over the edge of the tub. )

I'll grab some spare clothes and painkillers for you.

( Circulation is bound to improve with the heat of the water after all, helping along the swelling. Perhaps another cryo treatment is needed after he's dressed. Now, he's practically counting the seconds for Kaveh to bring up the next point of debate: sleeping arrangement.

All the worry is wiped off his face when he meets up with him again, providing him with a change of clothes and a few pills. Leaving him to that, Wriothesley goes over to the tub so he can drain and wash off the excess soap clinging to the waterline. )

I guess I'll take the floor tonight.

[ It's a little more slow-going than Kaveh would like. Even with the pain reduced, lifting his arms the whole way is hard, so drying off— especially his hair— isn't easy. But he manages it as well as he can, and by the time the other man comes back with clothes and medicine, he's using the towel to wring the worst of the water from his hair. With his mind a little clearer of the shock and the pain, modesty has him lower the towel to cover himself again when the warden enters, and his acceptance of the clothes is grateful, focusing on those first and foremost while the other man is working to clean out the bathtub.

Wriothesley's next words remind Kaveh that he's meant to be fighting him on this just a little, though, and so as he takes the pills, he shakes his head, says "no" once or twice aloud, and then moves to put a hand on the other's shoulder. He's managed to get his pants on, but he remains shirtless for the time being, but he wants to make his feelings on the situation clear. ]

You have already been far kinder to me than you needed to be, Wriothesley. I'm not gonna kick you out of your bed. [ And then, because he knows the other will argue the point— rightly— that Kaveh should be sleeping in a bed and not on the floor or a sofa, because he's injured, the blonde continues: ] We're grown men, and your bed has enough space for both of us plus probably two others. I trust you.

( With a look at his body under this light, even Wriothesley can tell Kaveh should take up some type of muscle-fortifying exercise. Had he taught him at least some basics in boxing, he could have handled off Mael without getting as hurt. He'll bring up the idea again sometime after he heals.

His smile only grows wider when he feels Kaveh's worrisome hand on his shoulder, which has him turning over and rising to his feet again. He expected the comeback, but he didn't expect Kaveh to wholly hand over his trust to him just like that. Forgiveness isn't so easy to accept when Wriothesley still feels ashamed of his actions that night.

The surprise is clear across his features, shining in his blue eyes like he'd just come across a miracle. Perhaps Kaveh is the kinder one between the two.

Wriothesley composes himself easily enough, glancing down at the darkened bruising on his arms. )

I was kidding, but I'm glad to hear that from you. You give me too much credit.

Put the shirt on unless you want to catch a cold.

( He grabs the towel on his way to the door, swinging it over his shoulder like he still has plans with it. He'll help Kaveh dry his hair more once they're in bed. )

[ It's funny how more than once this evening, Kaveh has wished he actually took Wriothesley up on some boxing lessons, if only so he didn't get so badly hurt. But right now that's neither here nor there; instead, he's watching the brief surprise across the other's face, and it makes him smile more gently for that split second before the warden composes himself again and looks away. ]

Maybe I do, [ Kaveh replies evenly. ] Or maybe I just know you well enough to recognize that you're not the kind of man who makes the same mistake twice.

[ Also, hazy as those moments were, the blonde remembers the look in his eyes when he realized someone had hurt him. Anyone who would get that angry on his behalf is someone he can trust, regardless of what happened before.

He puts on his shirt before following Wriothesley back into the bedroom and sitting on the edge of the bed. His movements are a little slow, but certainly less stiff than they were before— the bath has helped, the Cryo has helped, and the painkillers will kick in soon and make it even easier. ]

I don't know if there's anything else I can say right now except to keep thanking you.

( He's never going to offer Kaveh alcohol unless Kaveh asks for it, that's for sure. Wriothesley's bed is large enough for perhaps three people, so fitting Kaveh there isn't an issue.

Seeing Kaveh sitting on his bed doesn't seem real still. Wriothesley approaches him and drapes the towel over his head to massage off any excess water from his scalp or hair. It's bound to become an undulated mess once it fully dries, but he thinks he likes the look for him. )

You don't have to keep thanking me, as much as it's fun hearing you talk nonstop. At least change it up a bit otherwise you'll sound like a broken record.

( He lets out a soft laugh, looking down at him as he pulls the towel off to set aside. He takes on the other side of the bed, slipping underneath the sheets but sitting up against the back. He pats the pillow next to him. )

You're the first man ever to sleep here. What kind of reward would you like for the achievement?

Heh.

[ On one hand, he's grateful. Wriothesley has shown so much care for him this evening that there's no way he can possibly pay him back, even if he did the rest of the work on the Fortress for free. His hair is dried— and probably going to be messy, but that's okay— and the other is smiling as he pats the space next to him, inviting him into the bed.

On the other hand, he can't help but roll his eyes very pointedly as he's offered a "reward" for the "achievement" of being the first man in Wriothesley's bed.

And then of course there's that small part of him clamoring for him to demand a kiss— That part of him is dutifully ignored, and Kaveh goes to sit next to the other man with a curious, playful tilt of his head. ]

If I'm the first, are you saying you're not a man? [ A laugh, and then: ] In all seriousness, though.. you've done more than enough. I have no right to ask you for anything at all, not after everything you've done for me tonight.

Ah. You got me.

( Arms and ankles crossing under the sheets, Wriothesley can only offer Kaveh a smile. It's reassuring hearing Kaveh crack little jokes like that despite his condition, or despite sharing a bed with him altogether. Wriothesley only has his comfort at the forefront of his mind.

Of course Kaveh takes the offer seriously, too, as if he were bringing balance to the Universe in light of the prior humor. The dim light of the chasm past the large window pane casts dimness over the room and their faces. It's not the sun or moon that tells the time around here, but his biological clock making him realize how tired he is.

He wedges himself lower against his pillow, turning on his side to face Kaveh. )

Fair enough, then. But don't be afraid to wake me if you need anything, or if you're in too much pain. Yeah?

[ Kaveh turns too once he's settled, facing Wriothesley with a small nod. ]

Right, got it.

...Thanks, Wriothesley.

[ Perhaps it's just the emotional exhaustion, or perhaps the comfort of having someone whom he cares about close by, but Kaveh falls asleep quickly, breathing evening out almost as soon as his eyes close. And despite the pain, and the unfamiliar bed, not once through the night does he wake up. He does, however, unconsciously shuffle in closer at some point, head nestled into the space between Wriothesley's neck and his chest, an arm curling around the older man's waist.

And, Kaveh dreams. He dreams that he's wound up in the arms of someone who loves him, who wants to be with him no matter how difficult he can get. He dreams that he builds palaces, grander than anything he's built before, something perfect for their future. He dreams that everything is perfect, and he never has to worry about anything again— not his father, not his funds, not his feelings. He's happy, he's healthy, he's whole.

It's a feeling, a fantasy that lasts even as his body starts to wake him after a night's rest, halfway between awake and asleep, face still nestled in a warm chest, a sleepy heartbeat.

Kaveh doesn't even open his eyes. His head tilts up, a tender hum on his lips as he captures those across from him in a soft, sweet kiss. ]

( The night rolls steadily through his slumber and he finds it oddly soothing having a warm body next to him. It's not often Navia stays over, and he's able to relax fine around her. Yet he feels a sense of relief having the thought of Kaveh in his mind, because better to have him here than not at all.

Dreams are rare and far between, and he normally ends up hearing names long lost to time in echoes and corridors. Images botched in red and more red, oozing across wealthy floors and staining fine carpets. He realizes he's been here before and he learns to tune out the visuals just in time to feel the warmth of reality on his lips.

He steadily begins coming back from a cold sweat, feeling Kaveh's arms around him. Wriothesley had unknowingly wrapped their legs together, holding him just as shamelessly around his waist.

He's greeted with Kaveh's closed eyes, realizing what it is. If he's awake or just sleepwalking, he doesn't miss his chance to hold him in place to purse his lips against him in return. Once, twice, tilting his head so they lock easier. Slow and sensual, and in a way lazy but just what he needs. )

[ The return purse of lips against Kaveh's own only helps him buy into the fantasy; he sighs in sleepy content, and when the head against his tilts, his own does too in answer, finding together the perfect angle for their mouths to find home. It's the kind of kiss that sends shivers of delight down his spine, the exact type he's been dreaming about, and so it stretches on, even as Kaveh finds himself more awake than asleep, the realities of the waking world not having permeated past the dreamstate.

Arms lift from the lock around Wriothesley's waist, fingers curling into the sleep shirt he wears, tugging him close(r, if it's possible), and he snatches the briefest of breaths before pressing in again, mouth parting, a slow swipe of his tongue over the other's lower lip.

There's a small part of him waking up from the fog, little by little, realizing that this isn't a dream, that this is actually Wriothesley, and his mouth kind of hurts, actually, kissing him like this. But it's a much quieter part of his brain, easily silenced by that leaning into this and everything it is, relishing in the extension of his dream. ]

Hm...

( So much can be done if he's just pressing up against his lips, so it's a matter of time before his tongue is dancing its way between them. Kaveh tastes much better like this, real and within his consent. Wriothesley slides his arm away from his waist so he can brush back hair behind his ear, clutching the unruly locks that way at his skull. Just as he did in the cabin, he's very precise with any move, bold even. Sure, he's still hiding under the hope an excuse exists somewhere in the universe for this, even if each passing second becomes more vivid.

He doesn't care. There's no other way Wriothesley can have him and besides, Kaveh initiated it. He pauses to breathe in, gasping, and fully opening his eyes before he grinds their hips together so there's more of him he can connect with.

That's when he starts easing back against his pillow, drowned in the spotlight of the sudden realization that there is no actual way to talk himself out of this one. Then, he remembers the words: I trust you. )

I'm sorry, Kaveh, I shouldn't.

[ It's the grind of Wriothesley's hips that not only causes the other to start backing away, but also fully awakens Kaveh from the dream, his eyes opening wide and blinking once, twice, at the taste of the other on his mouth. His own breath is short, partly from the kiss and partly from the fact that he is very quickly beginning to panic, abject mortification taking his features as he backs up in turn, unentangling his legs from the warden's, swallowing hard as he fights the urge to look away, to run. ]

I— no, I— [ Deep breaths. One, two, three. ] No, I'm sorry, I— I was mostly asleep still and I— I wasn't thinking—

[ But even as he's talking himself into a panic attack, Kaveh's rational brain, apparently better when he's half-asleep, kicks into gear, a curious thread reaching out to loop itself around the anxiety, leashing it tight and rearing it back, causing his words to fall flat and his eyes to soften, something wondering in his gaze. ]

You shouldn't? [ he asks, and his voice is as soft as the stillness of the deep ocean around them. ] Or you don't want to?

( That's one way to heat up the morning and forget his room is normally a frigid temperature. Wriothesley's panic is manifesting more within the realm of justice, and how he should have known better. This is just another way for him to excuse betraying Kaveh's trust, is it not?

His pulse is rampant through the veins on his neck, flashing hot underneath his cheeks and ears as he begins to cool himself down. So much can be done to stop a mountain of pent-up energy from ultimately, tragically falling on them.

Kaveh's question hangs low under the pressure, followed by a type of silence worth a million words. Wriothesley slides his hand away from his hair, tidying it again in the process as he swallows his pride. His voice is barely above a whisper, shattered through a rasp of his vocal chords not quite tuning this early. )

I don't know anymore, Kaveh. I'm not put off by it.

[ "I don't know anymore," Wriothesley says, and Kaveh blinks at him, taking several long seconds to comprehend. There's something on the Warden's face that almost looks like— anxiety, perhaps? the blonde recognizes it well enough— and for a moment he wants to tell him that if he's not put off by it, then what's the problem?

But then, suddenly and with devastating clarity, the other's words from the night before surface once more in his mind. "You confuse me, Kaveh," he said, and all Kaveh could say was "I'm sorry" because he didn't understand. But now...

He raises a careful hand, cups the other's cheek in it as he holds his gaze, vermilion eyes soft and understanding even through the bruises and swelling decorating his face. ]

Will you talk to me? [ he asks, his voice soft. ] Will you tell me what's going through your mind?

( He feels remnants of Kaveh’s lips against him, tingling unlike any other craving he’s used to. He’s not afraid to keep his gaze there, held onto a more secure Kaveh. Many factors should be considered if he decides on taking this route with him and most of them are not exactly beneficial.

His eyes search Kaveh’s face, every lash on him, every ruined vessel showing signs of blackening around his socket. He’s less swollen now, though. His hand is warm against his cheek and Wriothesley likes the feeling, so his eyes close, bracing himself. )

You.

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